I was also lying through my teeth.
I just didn't know it yet.
I was sittin', looking out the window in the kitchen while on the phone with my friend Kristin, just chatting about her 3-year-old boy Leium and developments in her life, when I see something gray and covered in fur go stumbling across the yard.
"I have to go, Kristin. There's a... there's a possum runnin' across my yard!"
I ran to get my niece Delainey, who I'm pretty sure has never seen one in real life before. Now she was just starting to lie down at this point, and this is probably the reason we couldn't get her to nap until 5 p.m., long after my sister went on a date with my brother-in-law and D was left in the tender loving care of her grandparents and I, but that's another story for another time.
Wait. I think I just told you the whole story right there.
Well back to the story I'm trying to tell.
Delainey clambered up on a kitchen chair and we watched the opposum, as well as two very confused rabbits, run across the yard between our house and our neighbor's house. The rabbits really weren't running much, just stock-still and staring at the awful ugly fuzzy thing eating their food like it was the coming of Satan himself.
Eventually we couldn't see him out the kitchen window, so Christina, Delainey and I ran around to the front, where we caught sight of him again, just ambling on his merry way. He eventually stopped by our front bushes and just... sat.
Just sat there, chewing.
Delainey and I leaned out to watch him, and he didn't move at all, just... watched us right back. I'm sure we had pretty identical expressions on our faces, us and the opposum. Only we weren't chewing grass.
Can you see him? Top left corner.
That's how close we were.
When I was a little kid, an opposum found its way into my grandpa and grandma's barn out at their farmhouse and took up residence there, alongside the barn cats. It had little baby opposums. I showed my best friend at the time with an incredible amount of pride, because we could see its beady little eyes and that was clearly a sign of how awesome we were, to have seen one so close.
I think my level of enthusiasm today was the same, or even greater, than that fateful moment of my childhood.
Which is why I think I need a more exciting life, because clearly something is wrong when you get squealy and giggly about opposums.
Especially, my friends, when you are more excited than the three-year-old beside you.
Hello, my name is Katie, and I am excited by opposums.
I need help.